Author Topic: This lass' got my brain twisted  (Read 396 times)

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Offline Prox

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Re: This lass' got my brain twisted
« Reply #30 on: November 21, 2012, 08:32:21 AM »
If what you're saying is correct, then you should approach the guy and figure out what the hell is going on, if he's gonna try pulling a retard face on you, beat him up. That's my suggestion.


Offline Xrain

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Re: This lass' got my brain twisted
« Reply #31 on: November 21, 2012, 09:42:31 AM »
Leave it mate.

There are plenty of other women in the world I promise. (Even ones who are emotionally stable, and find nerdy fellows with ADHD and Asbergers appealing)


Yes you could do what prox said and beat him up, but honestly, do you really want a relationship where you have to be a jealous ass and beat the snot out of anyone who your girlfriend bats an eye at? I'd steer way clear of any woman who would find this attractive/ acceptable.

She wasn't manipulated into liking the other person. I understand why you might think that, but unless you have conclusive proof that he is physically abusing/ threatening her in order to get her to break up with you, if that's the case it's would be a whole nother matter entirely. But from the sounds of it, that isn't the case. That is definitely a bullshit way for her to break up with you. I know that she made you aware of the conflicts she was having, and it sounds real nice on the inside to be her knight in shining armor to go "help" her with her emotional issues; grand ideas in our heads rarely work out as well as you would hope.

You said you and her both have Asbergers, this definitely complicates the situation. One thing to remember, it's tough to fix something with a broken screwdriver. (yes I just called you a broken screwdriver, I'm sorry)

But my point still stands, it will be nearly impossible for you to help her with her asbergers related issues, when you are in that close of a relationship. Being bf/gf really complicates the hell out of it, and then when you are both trying to "fix" each other is just a recipe for disaster. One of you at least needs some pretty solid and level footing if you want to have the best chance of success. This is something that neither of you have.

If you were just friends, you could have a chance, as you could relate to each other, and help each other through things, but not have it complicated with relationship problems. (If you have romantic feelings for her, even if you aren't dating you wont be able to effectively help her as well.)


I don't know if you will take my advice, I know it is a bit harsh; but I really just wanted to be honest with you. This crap is stupidly complicated at times. And much of my advice doesn't apply in most situations. For example If you have had a long term (5 years+) stable relationship, and this problem just cropped up, it would be a different story.


So, enjoy it for what it was. It hurts, it's lame. But if this is how the beginning of your relationship is going, its not worth trying to keep sailing. The successes and the failures are all apart of life.

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Offline Travelsonic

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Re: This lass' got my brain twisted
« Reply #32 on: November 21, 2012, 09:59:53 AM »
If what you're saying is correct, then you should approach the guy and figure out what the hell is going on, if he's gonna try pulling a retard face on you, beat him up. That's my suggestion.


Heheheh, at one point I was thinking of dropping a bombshell on his Facebook page where people are raving about his status becoming 'in a relationship' - about how he catches his girls by manipulating them and brainwashing them into cheating on their boyfriends.

Xrain:  It isn't so much the relationship anymore than the little fuckhead owning up to what he did, and being forced to face consequences [which could be as simple as being exiled from the large group of friends I hang out with every day]
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Offline Prox

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Re: This lass' got my brain twisted
« Reply #33 on: November 21, 2012, 10:14:53 AM »
Yes you could do what prox said and beat him up, but honestly, do you really want a relationship where you have to be a jealous ass and beat the snot out of anyone who your girlfriend bats an eye at? I'd steer way clear of any woman who would find this attractive/ acceptable.
I suggested that because Travelsonic said that her girlfriend was being manipulated into breaking up/cutting all contacts with him which isn't the same thing as for her to choose this on her own.


Offline Tiger Guy

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Re: This lass' got my brain twisted
« Reply #34 on: November 21, 2012, 10:35:03 AM »
Do what Prox said; beat the living shit out of him and then forget about her.
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Offline Xrain

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Re: This lass' got my brain twisted
« Reply #35 on: November 21, 2012, 10:41:42 AM »
I suggested that because Travelsonic said that her girlfriend was being manipulated into breaking up/cutting all contacts with him which isn't the same thing as for her to choose this on her own.

And I was saying, it doesn't work like that. She has to be a bit willing to go along with doing something like that, unless there is some serious abuse happening. So getting mad at him for "manipulating" her into cutting him off isn't cool because that is a crap reason.

Socking him in the face for running off with your woman and gloating about it is a valid reason. But honestly I would be inclined to ignore both of them and go on my merry way.


Heheheh, at one point I was thinking of dropping a bombshell on his Facebook page where people are raving about his status becoming 'in a relationship' - about how he catches his girls by manipulating them and brainwashing them into cheating on their boyfriends.

Xrain:  It isn't so much the relationship anymore than the little fuckhead owning up to what he did, and being forced to face consequences [which could be as simple as being exiled from the large group of friends I hang out with every day]

Absolutely boot them out of your group of friends, there is a code among friends that you don't poach each others' girlfriends; doesn't really matter how he did it.

You were mentioning something about how it wasn't completely her fault, and implying that you still had feelings for her, and wanted to help her. I was attempting to tell you to:
- Not get back into a relationship with her
- There is no excuse for cheating on someone
- There wasn't much hope for you being much help to her because of your relationship
« Last Edit: November 21, 2012, 10:45:36 AM by Xrain »
" I don't take square roots, I make them. Then I set them out to cool after I baked them for 40 minutes."
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"Hold on I just have to ddos myself"
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Offline Prox

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Re: This lass' got my brain twisted
« Reply #36 on: November 21, 2012, 10:51:58 AM »
And I was saying, it doesn't work like that. She has to be a bit willing to go along with doing something like that, unless there is some serious abuse happening. So getting mad at him for "manipulating" her into cutting him off isn't cool because that is a crap reason.
I think it's everyone's personal choice how to act in this situation, besides I clearly don't know how exactly the situation is and I haven't said that Travelsonic should just go and beat him up, I said that only if the other guy would act like an idiot towards him or something like it when confronted about the issue.


Offline Deacon

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Re: This lass' got my brain twisted
« Reply #37 on: November 21, 2012, 12:54:34 PM »
I agree with Xrain entirely. If she left you for him, he did not force her into that. Unless he's threatening her, which would require police intervention. He may have talked himself up and talked you down, but she fell for it. She chose to go to him. And that is, in my eyes, not worth punching the guy in the face.

Offline memo3300

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Re: This lass' got my brain twisted
« Reply #38 on: November 21, 2012, 01:21:12 PM »
When i read "cheated on me" I didn't expected what came after.


From my point of view cheating is one of the worse things a gf/bf can do to you, and there are a lot of factors that should be taken in count if you should forgive her or break up.

If she didn't told you anything and you had to figure it out, it's not worth it  keep trying.








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Offline Travelsonic

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Re: This lass' got my brain twisted
« Reply #39 on: November 21, 2012, 07:49:29 PM »
Intervention it is - a few friends and I are going to run an intervention not to salvage a relationship, but to force him to fess up to what happened, and make sure she knows, and gets the picture, that she was manipulated and connived into cheating.

In the mean time, I am trying my damndest to not post this on his Facebook page under the update where he went into a relationship w/ my ex:

Quote
OK, you know what?

I've held my tongue, feels like forever though it has only been a day, but I have to say something.

This whole thing wouldn't be any problem if it didn't stink to high hell of manipulation, and if outright cheating had not been involved [and if she had broken up with me then found you or anything like that]. 

You know damn well it didn't have to happen the way it did, where you had her cheat on me [no additional terms like 'essentially' or 'sorta' - that's EXACTLY what fucking happened].  You know damned well that was the wrong thing to do - that she needed TRUE advice in handling the conflicts in feelings she was facing [as opposed to what apparently transpired], that you were going behind my back and making her go behind my back, AND breaking a promise made a good while back not to interfere with our relationship.  I bet that cutting off all communication and not even talking to me about what happened, accepting my calls on Skype the night before, or any of this shit leading up to the events of the other day - was her idea?  I may be slow at times, but I'm not fucking stupid.  I know damn well when the bullshit is being laid on thick... and no matter the thickness of the bullshit, the hurt can not be masked with false veils.

Though I hope I am wrong, the evidence is overwhelmingly supporting my gut feeling, and it sickens me.  Who'd think it'd end up like this.


Well, the intervention +/- this FB post would be a ton better than my initial idea - punch him in the kidneys until he pissed blood, and rip his scrotum+testicles off.




I suggested that because Travelsonic said that her girlfriend was being manipulated into breaking up/cutting all contacts with him which isn't the same thing as for her to choose this on her own.

Replace "breaking up/cutting all contacts" with "cheating on / cutting all contacts" and you're spot on.
« Last Edit: November 21, 2012, 10:23:54 PM by Travelsonic »
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