Fuck yeah titles!
Chosen because it was the first thing that comes to my mind when thinking about doing this, but I feel like it needs to be done.
As all of you probably haven't noticed since nobody checks the admin app section ever, I have recently (read: a few minutes hours ago) asked coolz to get rid of my admin application.
To prevent any people asking me as to why I decided to remove my admin app, I am making this thread (yes, a few people have done this already). Also because I can elaborate more on the reasons as to why I have decided to do this.
So yes, it's attention plz.
First of all, the tl;dr version:
- I don't think I am active enough to be admin.
- I don't think I have been connected enough with the community lately.
- Other people that are more active within the community deserve it more than I do and I would feel bad for making their ways to admin harder than they could be.
- I recently realised than rather than having "DON BAN THIS GUY DO THIS FOR ME GET IN THE KITCHEN AND MAKE ME DINNER", I want to have a normal, quiet round of TTT, ZS or Fretta - I doubt that would still be possible after getting admin.
- All in all, I feel as if I am perfectly fine where I am as VIP. I barely ever have to ban or kick in the first place.
- The main reason, as mentioned above, is still my inactivity though -- I have always wanted to become admin to help out people since I was extremely active (which I even mentioned on my admin app), but since I am not really anymore, I don't see why I should be admin.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Now that this is out of the way, there's honestly not much to say. But I'll try to elaborate on each and every reason.
- I don't think I am active enough to be admin.
Pretty much self explanatory. While I used to be active pretty much 24/7 during 2010, ever since 2011 started I have become less and less active. At first I simply blamed this on college putting shitloads of work on my back, but now that there are holidays, I still don't see myself playing GMod properly again - whenever I open it for more than half an hour, I get massively bored of it and end up quitting it again.
I remember back when I joined rNd - when no admins would ever be online and the servers kept themselves clean. Times have changed now and admins have become more active, and I don't see myself being anywhere near active enough to manage admin properly.
- I don't think I have been connected enough with the community lately.
This sort of explains itself as well. This goes hand-in-hand with the inactivity thing, but I just noticed at how less motivated I have been to lurk and post lately. Heck, even Cable picked up on this and asked me over Minecraft if I "raged out of the forums". I don't know why I seem to give off this impression to people, but I don't like it, and I interpret it as simply not being a proper part of a great community.
I used to always know what was going on anywhere within rNd, but I sort of stopped caring about every little things. I don't know why.
- Other people that are more active within the community deserve it more than I do and I would feel bad for making their ways to admin harder than they could be.
This one's simple to understand. I am not very active. Others are more active. Therefore, they do more for rNd and should receive a better position - I don't know if people will accidentally me for saying this, but other people such as Jman, Carp, Peetah and Yomo are much more active than I am and I myself believe that they would make better admins than I would - Of course I don't know for sure, I haven't been admin on rNd and neither have any of these been. I just wanted to include something so that this whole thing won't be purely about me.
By "making their ways harder", I mean that there was simply more to choose from with me applying as well. Nothing else to it.
- I recently realised than rather than having "DON BAN THIS GUY DO THIS FOR ME GET IN THE KITCHEN AND MAKE ME DINNER", I want to have a normal, quiet round of TTT, ZS or Fretta - I doubt that would still be possible after getting admin.
Now, this might seem like something minor, but it has actually been a major factor in deciding to do this. I noticed this during two different days; in one, there were no (or barely) any "known" people around and it was an average and quiet round of TTT. Then, the other day, several VIPs and Regulars were online, all yelling around at different angles and volumes about whatever they wanted to yell {dramatization}. Some people might enjoy the latter, but I prefer the former by miles. Sure, it's good to play with some noisy people that you know sometimes, but I just like to be able to completely focus on the game without any interference.
My point being, I have already seen this DO THIS DO THAT in my VIP times and I highly doubt it would get better if I would receive admin.
- The main reason, as mentioned above, is still my inactivity though -- I have always wanted to become admin to help out people since I was extremely active (which I even mentioned on my admin app), but since I am not really anymore, I don't see why I should be admin.
Yes, repeatan what I said before. I always wanted to be admin to counter all the inactive admins, but that's hardly doable without being active myself. I am not saying that I just about never play on rNd or anything, but I just don't feel like I play enough - an admin is supposed to help out the people whenever he can and is supposed to be active for long and I doubt I can provide either of those. I might be talking complete nonsense here, but that's what I think about this.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Now, that wasn't too much detail, but keep in my mind that it's 04:22 AM here and that I've been awake since 20 hours. </excuses>
Please keep in mind that I am in no way quitting rNd and I have done this calmly and without any rage. No one has influenced me in this decision; more likely the opposite, the few people I have talked to about this have told me that they would be disappointed in seeing me give up on admin, and I feel deeply sorry for letting these people down. Hopefully someone else has better chances of receiving admin now.
That's it, I'm done blowing things out of proportion. I hope this brings some clarity.
(By the way, this does not mean that I will never ever apply for anything ever again - maybe I'll apply again once I think that I meet all the requirements.)
Cheers,
Iamnotfuckingsigningmyownpostsgoddamnit
