.:`=-~rANdOm~`-=:.

Entertainment => Funny Stuffz => Topic started by: jimonions on May 07, 2010, 06:01:52 AM

Title: choosing a spouse
Post by: jimonions on May 07, 2010, 06:01:52 AM
CHOOSIN a SPOUSE   

   
A  man wanted to get married. He was having trouble  choosing among three likely candidates. He gives  each woman a present of $5,000 and watches to  see what they do with the  money.


The  first does a total makeover. She goes to a fancy  beauty salon, gets her hair done, new makeup;  buys several new outfits and dresses up very  nicely for the man. She tells him that she has  done this to be more attractive for him because  she loves him so much.

The  man was impressed.




The  second goes shopping to buy the man gifts. She  gets him a new set of golf clubs, some new  gizmos for his computer, and some expensive  clothes. As she presents these gifts, she tells  him that she has spent all the money on him  because she loves him so  much.


Again,  the man is  impressed......




The  third invests the money in the stock market. She  earns several times the $5,000. She gives him  back his $5,000 and reinvests the remainder in a  joint account. She tells him that she wants to  save for their future because she loves him so  much.




Obviously,  the man was impressed.




The  man thought for a long time about what each  woman had done with the money he'd given  her.



Then he  married the one with the biggest  tits.


Men  are like that, you  know.


Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: =-Mastgrr-= on May 07, 2010, 07:09:51 AM
lol
Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: carphunter963 on May 07, 2010, 07:14:55 AM
FTW!
Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: ƒąĢĢǿŧ™ on May 07, 2010, 07:41:54 AM
That was unexpected.
Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: Frank on May 07, 2010, 10:12:54 AM
LOL EPIC FUCKING LOL
Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: SabbathFreak911 on May 07, 2010, 12:39:47 PM
LOLZ
Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: DoeniDon on May 07, 2010, 12:47:26 PM
LOL
Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: » Magic « on May 07, 2010, 01:09:34 PM
I'm not like that :/
Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: jimonions on May 07, 2010, 02:51:06 PM
c-c-c-combo breaker magic.

I get a lot of these lolz from my dad thru email and i can post some of them when i get them on here if you want
Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: Peetah on May 07, 2010, 07:33:59 PM
And you have to consider this.
Go near the woman. The do your stuff.
Check her pants. If you see anything bulging out punch the woMAN and run for it. p.p
Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: Somerandomguy09 on May 07, 2010, 07:39:20 PM
*resets combo
LULZ

Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: Mr.Franklin on May 08, 2010, 03:29:11 AM
TROLOLOLOL
Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: » Magic « on May 08, 2010, 04:35:10 AM
c-c-c-combo breaker magic.

I get a lot of these lolz from my dad thru email and i can post some of them when i get them on here if you want


r-r-r-re c-c-c-combo breaker :D!



FROM YOUR DAD LOL WTF
Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: jimonions on May 08, 2010, 05:30:27 AM

r-r-r-re c-c-c-combo breaker :D!



FROM YOUR DAD LOL WTF

BWAH, I get like 4 every week, I dont know where he gets them but he obviously has too much spare time, from what i know hes starting a company that sells phones to banks after quiting his other job cus the new boss was a big fag. It looks like he will overtake his older company too.
Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: ArTIk*BaNAnA on May 08, 2010, 05:36:05 AM
LOL, thought he will pick the first one cause she looks better now from the others lawl

Men  are like that, you  know.

I'm not =D  But of-course I won't choose a ugly shit face woman lawl
Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: Frank on May 08, 2010, 06:13:29 AM
I'd choose the one with the best tits, best ass, best face...


And a pingas, of course.
Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: ƒąĢĢǿŧ™ on May 08, 2010, 09:10:36 PM
I'd choose the one with the best tits, best ass, best face...


And a pingas, of course.
HMmm, i have a chest muscle which makes my men boobs big.
I don't know about my ass. And maybe the best face.
Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: Frank on May 09, 2010, 07:47:46 AM
BUT, either a Shemale or a Gay.

I don't want simple crossdressers.

Womens alsho welcum
Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: Peetah on May 12, 2010, 02:40:36 PM
lol arent you guys a little young to be talking about this? p.p
Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: ƒąĢĢǿŧ™ on May 13, 2010, 03:40:53 AM
lol arent you guys a little young to be talking about this? p.p
WHy me.
Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: me4488 on May 14, 2010, 12:51:46 PM
lol arent you guys a little young to be talking about this? p.p
Nah at bulgaria we go ahead and start watching porn at 12, get drunk at 14 and probably get laid afterward(unfortunately i havent benn lucky enough to hit sum1 yet :'()
Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: jimonions on May 14, 2010, 03:30:53 PM
Nah at bulgaria we go ahead and start watching porn at 12, get drunk at 14 and probably get laid afterward(unfortunately i havent benn lucky enough to hit sum1 yet :'()

sounds dangerous lol im ging to quote my sex ed teacher
Quote
Abstinance is the right choice
Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: DoeniDon on May 14, 2010, 03:33:22 PM
Nah at bulgaria we go ahead and start watching porn at 12, get drunk at 14 and probably get laid afterward(unfortunately i havent benn lucky enough to hit sum1 yet :'()
So Bulgaria is just like every other European Country.
Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: me4488 on May 15, 2010, 02:00:20 AM
So Bulgaria is just like every other European Country.
Nope its a lot worse... Europe is fine! but bulgaria sux and rules at the same time!
Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: carphunter963 on May 15, 2010, 08:42:12 PM
i have abstinence tattooed above my dick.
Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: jimonions on May 15, 2010, 09:15:22 PM
That must hurt, what will your gf say
Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: Sanders on May 15, 2010, 09:27:18 PM
i have abstinence tattooed above my dick.
Really... Thats worse than like Dora the explorer tattooed on your dick
Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: ArTIk*BaNAnA on May 16, 2010, 08:46:46 AM
Nah at bulgaria we go ahead and start watching porn at 12, get drunk at 14 and probably get laid afterward(unfortunately i havent benn lucky enough to hit sum1 yet :'()

Lolwut, here in Israel we watch porn at age 8 (everyone except the nerds and girls lol), many of the Israeli's get drunk and start smoking at age 10 and get laid at age 14, though most get drunk on age 16, almost never smoke (or they try at age 16/18) and get laid at age 15-19 =D
Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: ƒąĢĢǿŧ™ on May 17, 2010, 04:33:31 AM
Lolwut, here in Israel we watch porn at age 8 (everyone except the nerds and girls lol), many of the Israeli's get drunk and start smoking at age 10 and get laid at age 14, though most get drunk on age 16, almost never smoke (or they try at age 16/18) and get laid at age 15-19 =D
That's fucked up.
Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: ArTIk*BaNAnA on May 17, 2010, 08:15:58 AM
That's fucked up.

Meh, there are places where it's worse lawl
Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: UberLord on May 17, 2010, 08:33:18 PM
One of my best friends almost got layed when he was 11...
Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: Krasher on May 17, 2010, 08:52:51 PM
One of my best friends almost got layed when he was 11...
I DID get laid when i was 11*

*Some restrictions may apply
Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: UberLord on May 17, 2010, 09:39:34 PM
What restrictions? TELL ME WHAT YOU DID YOUNG MAN!
EDIT: that makes me sound like a pedo, I meant, what were the restrictions? I define laid as getting gina, atleast.
Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: ArTIk*BaNAnA on May 18, 2010, 02:36:53 AM
Wow this thread got epicly de-railed lol, get back on-topic or I'll lock.
Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: jimonions on May 18, 2010, 03:25:43 AM
This thread is lol thread or whine about what age you looked at porn and all that shiz i dont want this locked theres lots of interesting stuff on here.
Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: ArTIk*BaNAnA on May 18, 2010, 04:31:02 AM
This thread is lol thread or whine about what age you looked at porn and all that shiz i dont want this locked theres lots of interesting stuff on here.

Ok, I also like it lol so I'll change the thread subject xD
Title: Re: Random funny shiz thread
Post by: jimonions on May 18, 2010, 05:16:51 AM
>:( dont do that
Title: Re: Random funny shiz thread
Post by: UberLord on May 18, 2010, 02:18:56 PM
>:( dont do that
I saw what you did with the title, you see, have won.
I like this thread. It's pretty win.
Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: me4488 on May 21, 2010, 09:55:27 AM
Wow this thread got epicly de-railed lol, get back on-topic or I'll lock.
U mean the part that every1 evolved to pedo-tards?
Title: Re: choosing a spouse
Post by: jimonions on May 21, 2010, 03:08:08 PM
No me4488 drop it, you see thats how spam gets started.