.:`=-~rANdOm~`-=:. Game Servers (Read Only) > Discussion

Proofread my essay please

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CodeKyuubi:
Could you read over my essay for a college application? (It's an art college)

Prompt: Choose a work of art or design that you consider to be significant. Imagine that the work had never been made. How would the world be worse off (or better off) without it?

Essay: https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/21922208/OTIS2.doc
Word limit: 965 of 1000

I think I answer the prompt pretty well, but I may have also gone off topic a little and missed out on much if at all of what they can tell about me as a person. Be brutally honest with me and don't mince words (Also it's due today  8)). Tell me what you think I'm missing and what I need more of if I do have it.  :-*

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